Alternatively titled, a random collection of thoughts on one topic – being single.
Public Service Announcement
This is the last Dateless December post! Let’s be honest, my blog should be called Destined to be Dateless because I’m becoming perpetually single (read #foreveralone) so I still have a lot of material left on the topic. Hope you’ve enjoyed the series and this final post.
Dear Twenty Somethings,
They say write what you know and boy do I know about being single. I’m starting to think that the last time someone was interested in me was either a dream or a figment of my imagination. Not sure why, because obviously I’m a catch, but here we are. I’m not sure why this has always bugged me but here I am, a typical self-obsessed millennial blogging about my days as a single, hot female and wondering why it’s been a looong time since I’ve had any prospects.
But then, I got sick and tired of complaining about it. I needed to embrace my singleness (as if I had a choice). Being out of a relationship for so long was like being in a drought. And, like Hilary Duff, I realized that waiting for my own Chad Michael Murray was like waiting for rain in a drought – useless and disappointing. Just as disappointing if you don’t get that reference. Sorry, back on track… so, I decided to dedicate December to be Dateless December (aka Dateless Destiny at this point) to talk about embracing being single instead – something I always had trouble with.
I will, for lack of a better term, embrace my destiny.
(My apologies for overuse of the word embrace)
Some people are destined to be in loving relationships. Other people are destined to be cat ladies or greying bachelors. I’m starting to think I’m destined to be a crazy dog lady/fun aunt.I’ve got all the necessary qualifications for being the crazy dog lady/fun aunt.
- I have nephews and I know at least one of them thinks I’m funny. Also, I basically have a hundred kids (#campmomthings) who seem to
- My obsession with dogs is real. I have TWO pug sweaters so I’m on my way to crazy status. My Instagram feed is filled with dog accounts. All I need is my own house and dogs to fill it.
- I love wine. All fun aunts love wine.
- No word of a lie, all my aunts are hilarious so I’ve got good role models.
- Nobody wants to date me.
“Embrace” has clearly become the keyword on my single journey. It was hard to let go of the fairytale and I still hold on to some hope, but…
I’m realizing more and more the perks of being single.
That’s the key to embracing the single – find the perks. Here are just a few.
- I have a king-sized bed all to myself. Even though I only sleep on one side of the bed, I don’t have to.
- More pillows. Also more covers.
- I can be a strong, independent woman. Sure, it would help to have someone reach things on high shelves for me but that’s what chairs and stools are for!
- One less person to buy gifts for. Being single is the economical choice.
- Less sharing my food.
- Time to grow as an individual and learn more about myself.
- Not having to pretend to be interested in something that I’m definitely not.
- Getting to wear ugly (yet comfortable) underwear.
Why am I Single?
Pretty good list if you ask me. As cheesy as this sounds, being single has afforded me the luxury of learning about who I am (#whyamIlikethis) and growing as an independent woman who don’t need no man. It’s also forced me into the uncomfortable spot of trying to figure out why I’m single. So I thought about it. I couldn’t really tell you why nobody has tried to date me recently. But there are some things I can say with absolute certainty on my end. Frankly, I’m single now because I got tired of trying. My online dating profile has become a shameless blog plug (story of my life) and chance to go see sports games without having to pay for tickets.
I’ve tried almost every dating app there is out there and in my humble opinion, they’re all garbage. Either I’m doing them wrong (a strong possibility) or it’s just not the right option for me. Regardless, maybe I’m just meant to be single or it’s just not the right time. Neither one of those is an easy pill to swallow.
What has Dateless December taught me?
Do I hate being single? Parts of it, yes. Do I want to be in a relationship? Mostly, yes. What Dateless December has taught me is that I can be happy without a relationship. It’s not the path I would have chosen to take when envisioning my future. However, if that’s what happens, I’m (mostly) okay with it, even if it’s easier said than done. I know my worth and am not going to jump into a relationship just to be in one. There’s still time and I’ve got my own girl boss empire to start building in the meantime. I’m not going to wait for Prince Charming, but if he is indeed around the corner he’s going to find this princess building her own castle and saving herself. She’ll be a little fiercely independent but she’ll be confident in her worth and a pretty good partner in crime. If you’re lucky, she’ll even share a king-sized bed and her food.
Here is my (unsolicited) advice
It’s been awhile since I’ve given some unsolicited advice, so here you go!
- Oscar Wilde said it best when he said, “to love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.” I recognize that loving yourself can be a struggle. I get it, I’ve been there myself. Loving yourself and knowing who you are are two important life lessons. They’re hard, but not impossible.
- Never compromise yourself for someone else.
- It is okay to have higher standards. Knowing your worth is important. Just don’t set them to impossibly high expectations that nobody can ever reach.
- Never settle for less than you deserve.
And with that, Dateless December has come to an end. I really hope everyone enjoyed the series. Until next time…
PS. If you made it through this entire post, do me a favour and let me know! You can personally message me, or comment “no wonder why you’re single” on here or on my social media. I love learning that people actually read these. Help validate my little millennial heart.