Alternatively titled, what to do when the umpteenth relative asks you why you’re single
Public Service Announcement
Welcome to the second post in Dateless December, my series on being single. This week I’m here with a holiday survival guide for singles. I make a lot of jokes in this one (or attempt to at least) but I actually LOVE the holidays. Seriously, I own three separate Christmas sweaters, two of which feature jolly pugs, and a hat with pugs that says bah humpug. But, I digress. Hopefully, my humour comes across and if not, my apologies. Also, if you’re a family member reading this, obviously none of this refers to you 😉
Dear Twenty Somethings,
The holidays are such a joyous time. Outside looks like a winter wonderland of white snow, unidentifiable gray slush, and blustering winds that threaten to knock you down. The streets are filled with people taken with the wonderful holiday spirit. Malls are bursting at the seam with miserable shoppers who look like they’d rather be anywhere else but love stopping in the middle of the mall to take a smiling selfie.
Holidays are a time to listen to cheery songs about red-nosed reindeer or a creepy man trying to convince an unwilling woman to stay with him for a romantic evening despite her protest and concern that he put something in her drink.
Most importantly, the holidays are time to celebrate with your loved ones. Holiday parties and get-togethers are sweet occasions where you can find yourself fielding questions about why you’re single or suggestions to help you “find your true love.” Or pretending to be interested in hearing about how your third cousin (twice removed) has finally found love while Aunt Sally pats your arm reassuringly. Nothing says happy holidays like an interrogation fit for a CIA movie or a film on the Spanish Inquisition.